Self-Love: How I Got My Shit Together

learning to be me

Self-love is defined as regard for one’s own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than narcissistic characteristic).

Everyone, including me, always talks about “self-love,” figure yourself out, love yourself first before you get into a relationship, blah blah blah. In my opinion, you obtain self-love by doing compassionate things for yourself, so you can appreciate and do considerate things for others. These are some of the things I did, when I was working on myself. I am a constant work in progress. Here’s what I recommend:

  1. Stop comparing yourself to others.
  2. You’re not as fat as you think you are.
  3. Exercise because it is GOOD for you, not so you can just look skinny and have a “box gap” (only Ja’mie fans will appreciate that)
  4. Find something you are good at. Maybe you are really amazing at working with kids, and you just don’t know it yet.
  5. Spend more time with your girlfriends or dude friends. Relationships may come and go, but friends are forever. Cherish that.
  6. Spend time alone. It’s ok if you want to stay home on a Friday night, catch up on your DVR, and eat fro yo because you have had an exhausting work week.
  7. Read that book you’ve always been interested in. I recommend White Oleander or any novel by Chuck Palahniuk.
  8. Read more books.
  9. Spend time outside. Discover a new trail or mountain to hike.
  10. Take lots of pictures. Take way too many. Don’t forget to print them out. Don’t let them just sit on your phone.
  11. Let go of the past. Forgive the people that hurt you, so that YOU can move on. Carrying around anger only poisons you.
  12. Reunite with old friends from highschool, college, and old jobs. Let go of friendships that no longer serve you. People grow apart, it’s natural.
  13. Call your friends more. Don’t just see what they are up to via Facebook and Instagram.
  14. Resolve the issues with your family. Tell them you love them. Show up to family events, don’t have something else better to do.
  15. Take vitamins, because you want to be the healthiest bi*ch you can be.
  16. Care about your appearance. Not in a vain, superficial way. Care about how you look, so you can feel good when you leave the house.
  17. …But, if you feel like wearing sweatpants and a bun to the grocery store once in a while, go fu*king do it. Let everyone look at you like you just rolled out of bed. Maybe you did. Who cares?
  18. Watch that movie or that Netflix series you’ve always wanted to see. I started Pretty Little Liars and it was one of the biggest mistakes I ever made. At least I tried.
  19. Pick up a hobby. My roommates and I ordered Paint-by-numbers from Amazon. It made me feel creative and I got some roomie bonding time.
  20. Appreciate your body and all the things it can do. Stop picking it apart. You will never achieve perfection.
  21. Save up money and travel somewhere new.
  22. Laugh at yourself. If you trip over your feet or realize your shirt is on inside out, don’t worry, boo. Make a joke out of it. You’ll be ok.
  23. Do karaoke. Do it sober. Do it drunk. Sing. I read somewhere the more you sing, the happier and healthier it will make you. Here, read this:
  24. Eat less processed food. If you truly knew what was in that shit you would be disgusted. Watch the documentary, “Food Inc.”
  25. …But, if you want to have fries, with extra, extra, ranch sometimes, do it.
  26. Dance. Freak Dance. Weird Dance. Make up a dance routine with your friends like when you were 12. Stop caring what you look like. Have fun.
  27. Smile more. There was a study somewhere that the more you smile, the happier you feel, and it makes others happier too. Just take my word for it.
  28. Do favors and don’t expect anything in return. Do things out of the kindness of your heart.
  29. Guard your heart, but be open. Don’t let people take advantage of you.
  30. Be less judgmental. What’s that quote? “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”
  31. Look up at the sky. Realize that sunsets are incredibly gorgeous. Look at the stars, they’re pretty amazing too.
  32. You will never be able to please everyone. Not everyone is going to like you. You won’t like everyone you meet. That’s perfectly fine also.
  33. Love yourself. Don’t be a conceited bi*ch, but you know what I mean.

Need more inspiration? Watch this > Everybody’s Free To Wear Suncreen


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